When we say “yes” to something, we say “no” to something else. Oftentimes we are saying no to ourselves or taking time away from our priorities. With that in mind, I set myself a goal of saying “no” three times a week. I figured that was a manageable number and would help keep my focus on the highest impact and most important things in life.
…Well, things didn’t quite work out as I had hoped. I think I have one and a half “no”s over a few weeks. Not only that, I said “yes” to many more new things. So, I ended up regressing instead of making progress. Saying no is really hard, even when you make a plan to do it.
While I work on my skills at declining, I wanted to share two techniques to help manage the yeses.
🤔Understand what your role is. This comes from the Teaming framework as part of aligning on who does what in a given team. But you don’t have to wait for the team to do it. If you get added to a new team or project, make sure to ask what your role is. Don’t just show up for weeks of meetings sitting there wondering what is going on. Who knows, maybe you don’t actually need to be there at all. You could discover an easy “no”.
📃Set an agenda. So many meetings just get thrown onto calendars. Many of the invitees don’t know the purpose of the meeting or what is required of them. Sending people the plan in advance allows them time to prepare or prioritize their time elsewhere if they are not needed.
Yours in reluctant acceptance,
Petey D